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Paul Phillips |
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I'm in tears, I'm laughing so hard. I especially loved the part where Phil thanked the guy.
I'll bet UB actually pays Phil by the curse word. They probably get way more traffic just to watch the guy self-destruct that if he just played like a normally functioning member of society.
I've never had the... um... pleasure of playing at UB. I am completely shocked at the level of maturity displayed by Hellmuth here. I always kinda figured that he'd just keep his damn mouth shut on UB, but he's worse than most of the idiots online.
I don't understand how a website could use this guy to openly promote them when he bashes people who are using the product? When I am shopping I don't need someone yelling and me and telling me I have no taste in shirts and pants....I can figure it out myself. Do you think there is any chance they would stop using him to promote UB?
If I recall correctly, Phil is close friends with the owner of UB.
is the same George who occasionally shows up in my journal for comic relief. I guarantee you he forgot more about triple draw yesterday than Phil knows.
"you have the brain of a four year old child and I bet he was glad to get rid of it"- Groucho Marx
Perhaps you can log Ivy on to UB and have a showdown with Phil.
Once in a while, he'll pop into some low-stakes Omaha and 2-7 games while I'm on. He pulls a lot of that standing-pat-with-any-unpaired-hand crap, and when he loses (which is often), he berates someone for capping with a rough six or something.
That being said, I don't really dislike Hellmuth. He comes off slick in interviews, and I suspect that most of his table act is, well, an act. I'm sure he doesn't mind any additional action he gets from players who dislike him. I'd bet it's annoying to play him live, but from afar I kinda dig the uber-brat vibe. Am I psychotic?
When your specialty is aggressive play in HLHE tourneys, you DON'T want action. In fact, when you get action, you best say, "keep doin' that and I'm gunna get alll your chips."
Where's the screenshots? I don't see any.
Sorry, I just had another fun DSL flail and improving.org went away. It's back now.
this hellmuth guy is pretty damn bad at draw popker, as far as i can tell. If he keeps it up, he's going to be bropke.
this is similar to watching Matusow self destruct heads up on FullTilt at the 25-50 NL tables...I'm more curious how Hellmuth has so many typos when he's been on UB for years now.....
all the good jopkes i thought of were already taken...
- toddly
Wow. Isn't Phil like 40-ish? That kind of chat is embarassing if you are 19, let alone his age. I see dropping out of college did nothing for his spelling and grammar and general writing ability.
As far as "representing" UB, well he probably attracts action from people that just want to put a beat on him and provoke a temper tantrum. I've never played at UB with Hellmuth, but I put a pretty sick beat on Annie in a 2-7 game once (I played like a donkey and hit a miracle 7-5). She just said "nh". Of course, it was only $3/$6, which is decent stakes for me but not her. Oh, Paul, how do you still have the time to check out Philly? Don't you have a diaper to go change ;)
Seriously? I'm having a hard time with this. I'm not the coolest costumer but I don't even act like this! Wow, this is embarassing! I feel for his family.
I've played with Phil online, and seen the same thing. It's funny to me.
I wonder what kind of tantrums he has when his wife asks him to take out the garbage.
This behavior and level of play are not uncommon for Phil on UB. Every time I've played the deuce game with him (maybe half a dozen times), I've had similar experiences. One time he went as far as to comment on a play I made by saying "yum yum."
This is without a doubt the funniest poker blog entry I have ever read! Congrats Paul on absolute HIGH COMEDY! You are a genius!
Other Phil story: I have a friend here in the Philippines who is a pro basketball player. He used to play pick up games with Phil at Wisconsin back in the day. He says Phil was a massive whiner who was not good enough for that game and very difficult to tolerate. The funny part is he told me all of this without having ever heard of the guy's poker career. He didn't even know what a famous anus Phil has turned out to be...
LOL!
Perhaps Phil used up most of his +KARMA in 1989, or has so much left over he has to act like a 3 year old in a grocery store (sorry Paul you will see this in due time) for the rest of his life. Phil's antics are hard to take seriously, I look forward to our first table meeting, I promised myself 2 years ago I would bluff him off a hand with 72o and then show it. -Bri
Is there any possibility it was someone else playing his account ? Wasn't there some fuss a few months ago about Hellmuth being spotted somewhere off-line while his account was being played ?
Me, I don't play UB anyway. They seem to have a plan to sponsor all the most obnoxious professionals they can find. Maybe I'm cutting my nose off to spite my face but it's not something I lose a lot of sleep over. Andy. www.pokersoft.blogspot.com
if it is, he does a damn good Phil Hellmouth impression! Passes my Hellmuth Turing test.
I thought the Turing test only applied to artifical _intelligence_
Nonetheless you have a point :-) Andy.
Actually, the original Turing test was whether you could tell a man from a woman (both trying to seem like a man, or both like a woman) by conversing with them through a data terminal. He then went on to propose it as a test for AI, and that is how we think of it nowadays, but that was not the first example he gave. Try reading the original material, it's fairly readable and quite interesting.
Oh, and never doubt me :).
the stimulating debate phil likes to engage in at the completion of a well-contested hand
cracked up at this line.
There's money to be made in making up a few hundred "I Sucked Out On Phil Hellmuth And All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt Covered With His Spittle As He Berated Me" shirts
Win - Place - Show, you sweep once again Paul.
I'm surprised he didn't put on his tin foil hat and scream after losing that disconnected hand against you.
Man, Helmuth really can't type. It's like talking to some 13 year-old playing Counterstrike.
Typos are easy for me to overlook, like the "jopke" thing. I can understand how people typing quickly add or lose a letter here or there.
But the behavior Phil exhibits can't be blamed on typos. More than just unprofessional - it's downright immature and reminiscent of lots of the juvenile whiners in online poker. It's like junior high all over again, minus the mandatory showering with other guys in the locker room. That said, I love to watch Phil play. He makes for good TV.
Typos are understandable, but the stuff he was laying out were rage induced typos. Being so pissed off that you fatfinger every other word is just hilarity.
I would have expected one more line from the chat box after that great hand:
Paulp: "Now that's JUSTICE!" Surely that would have put Phil on tilt and possibly even gotten you banned from UB permanently. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||